besides yung berg's recent proclamation about not dating 'dark butts', some real life events, and my watching an old movie where all the love interests were light-skinned, but not necessarily pretty, this is a topic that never seems to stay away long enough. i always longed for the day where people would see colorism as symbolic of the ravages of mental enslavement. where our people would realize that having lighter skin, a skinnier nose, or light eyes does not make you 'better', does not make your 'kids cuter' and doesn't mean you're prettier than your darker featured counterparts. i am admittedly biased in this discussion, i'm a cinnamony color (but will round up if you have a 'chocolate deluxe' wu tang shirt--i really want one!) that no one would consider light-skinned and am proud of it. i grew up around mostly white people so i didn't directly experience colorism as a child--either you were white or you weren't. there was no one to compare hair textures or skin color and make value judgments among the black kids. i somehow still picked up the 'white/light is right' idea at an early age and had to unlearn and unshackle myself. . .but that's a different story.
anyway, i just want to know what it's going to take for us to see each other as equally beautiful regardless of hue. when guys are going to stop saying 'you're pretty for a brown girl' or when my eyebrows will stop raising in shock when the love interest in a music video is a pretty brown girl (note i say 'love interest' and not booty shaker--brown girls have always been chosen to shake their booties and be sexualized). when is having features unique to black women (besides a large butt) going to be admired as much as having features that point to having white people in our recent ancestry? and why do we continue to legitimize their beauty standards while they themselves are going under the knife and spending thousands of dollars to look more like us??
**i wanted to update after i read the new newsweek with michelle obama on the cover. i feel a special appreciation for michelle (i can't wait to be able to meet her! and will definitely be saving her vogue cover when it comes out) and was secretly pleased the first time i discovered barack had a brown wife. i think she can do so much just by being herself and i'm so excited about the possibilities. the article featured an author chronicling her brunch discussions with her 'sister friends' about what michelle means to them, which i think is right on:
our conversation wandered into one area we seldom discuss, even among our families and closest confidantes. Michelle is not only african-american, but brown. real brown. in an era when beauty is often defined on television, in magazines and in moves as fair or white skin, long straight hair and keen features, michelle looks nothing like the supermodels who rule the catwalks or the porcelain faced actresses who hawk must-have cosmetics. yet now she's going to grace the march cover of vogue magazine--the ultimate affirmation of beauty.
who and what is beautiful has long been a source of pain, anger, and frustration in the african-american community. in too many cases, beauty for black women (and even black men) has meant fair skin, "good har" and dainty facial features. over the years, african-american icons likelena horne, dorothy dandridge, halle berry and beyonce--while beautiful and talented--haven't exactly represented the diversity of complexions and features of most black women in this country. that limited scope has had a profound effect on the self-esteem of many african-american women. . .
5 comments:
i think most people who have a color complex are insecure.. i was fortunate that i never thought of 'white' as being right, mainly because my mother always taught me that there's so much to be proud of by being a black woman. i was also around black people my whole life and they ranged in hue from light bright almost white (i.e. the black folks that could 'pass') to the blue black black folks (c'mon you know what i'm talking about!). anyway, skin color is still something that we as a people struggle with. hmmmm i don't know why. all i know is that i love seeing a powerful black man with a strong sister by his side.. i don't care if she's light bright or blue black!
hmm, maybe that was where i went wrong--i wasn't surrounded by extended family or even other black people to reinforce what my mother was telling me.
i agree a strong sister and a powerful black man is a lovely sight to see regardless of hue. . .while a trophy or empty stereotype of a woman is not.
I think it will take time for society to disentangle itself from this disruptive mindset. It took time to get there, so it'll take time to get away from it. I don't think it is a matter of someone with a color complex believing that lighter skin is better than darker skin; I believe that person has taken notice of the higher social value lighter skinned people may enjoy, has chosen to lay down their arms in the fight against such illogical discrimination, and waved the white flag for better or worse.
I thought you said your blog wasn't that "deep". I respectfully disagree! Very thought-provoking.
Great Post Stilettos:
I remember the first time I experienced colorism or rather became aware of it. I am butter-pecan Puerto Rican and I grew up in a predominately black neighborhood. My best friend in kindergarden was brown-skinned and she was beautiful. None of the little boys liked her, instead they all liked a light-skinned girl in the class who was not very attractive. I found it so sad that I had to convince her during every nap time that she was beautiful.....
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